Year 2000 Predictions

1. In August, Shirley McClaine will be kidnapped by aliens---again. (oh, sorry-that was last year).

2. The Rebel Flock News will surpass the New York Times in electronic circulation overnight.

3. Benny Hinn will grow another leg.

4. During a fall storm in Oklahoma, the electricity will go out in the dorm rooms of Oral Roberts University. Men and women may meet after all.

5. Someone will hack the computers in the offices of the General Baptist Conference. A virus will be introduced into all computers containing the contents of the King James Bible - and somehow those words into the NEW King James version. Problem is-the word Baptist,used as a demonimation, isn't in any of these versions. Hmmmm.

6. Sometime this year when the switch is thrown in the electric chair room at the Texas State Prison - nothing happens. But on the other side of the world, the lights in a little apartment in Nice, France go out.

7. Around April the computer-controlled frozen chamber where the antichrist is being kept (who has been known by the government since 1949) warms up, and well- you know the rest.

8. Sometime later this year, the sainted dead nun in the monastery in Lordes, France who cries real tears will suddenly realize - everything's going to be OK - no more tears!

9. Coca Cola factories will no longer produce Tab. The Tab shortage will cause world-wide riots.

10. In some parts of the world, life will go on as usual.

11. In other parts of the world, life will go on as usual.

12. A child will be born in Amsterdam with a chip already installed.

13. Jesus will return this year - maybe. Then again, it could be another 1000 years. No-one knows. :)